Allison Thorson, assistant professor of communication studies and author or “I Heard it
Through the Grapevine: Cheating and the Influence of Discovery Method on
Relational Outcomes.”
Even as elected officials and celebrities continue the
parade of public apologies following revelations of marital infidelity,
research by University of San
Francisco
Assistant Professor of communication studies Allison Thorson suggests our
understanding of the impact of those infidelities on the youngest members of
families, the children, is largely misunderstood.
Thorson’s research, outlined in the article “I Heard it
Through the Grapevine: Cheating and the Influence of Discovery Method on
Relational Outcomes,” is now being
considered for publication and was a top paper at the National Communication
Association Conference 2008 in San Diego (The paper was then titled “The
Influence of Discovery Method on Parent-Adult Child Relational Outcomes: A
Study of Communication Surrounding Parental Infidelity”). The research turns on its head a decade-old belief
that the damage to the parent-child relationship and the ability to salvage the
relationship depends on whether the child learned of the infidelity from the
parent who committed it, the victim of the infidelity, or a third party, and
whether the cheating parent was able to immediately apologize and explain their
behavior.
Up until now, researchers largely based their belief – that
the damage to the parent-child relationship could be, to a greater or lesser
extent, mitigated by how a child learned of the infidelity – on research published
in 2001 by three Pennsylvania State University researchers, Walid Afifi, Wendy Falato,
and Judith Weiner.
In that study, of infidelity between dating partners, the
degree to which the cheating partner was able to salvage the relationship
depended on their ability to “save face,” or, in research lingo, “make a face
redress,” by being present when their partner learned about the infidelity, by
immediately apologizing, and by giving an account of their behavior, Thorson
said.
Thorson’s research, however, suggests that how a child
learned of parental infidelity had little or no impact on whether and to what
degree the parent-child relationship could be saved.
“The findings from my current study suggest that Afifi et
al.’s findings may be limited to dating relationships and are not applicable to
parent-child relationships,” Thorson said.
Based on her results and keeping in mind that infidelity
affects the relationships of all individuals connected to an affair, Thorson
argues that research beyond the narrow focus of the couple is needed to better
understand infidelity and the communication of it.
Thorson, also the author of a related study “Adult
Children's Experiences with their Parent's Infidelity: Communicative Protection
and Access Rules in the Absence of Divorce” published in the journal Communication Studies in 2009, has long been drawn to study how family
interaction and communication might help buffer against the consequences of
stressors such as infidelity.
“I have an interest in how families, in particular children,
cope and are able to persevere after experiencing severe stressors or
encountering non-normative events that could potentially threaten their sense
of security and wellbeing,” Thorson said.
